


Unhelpful Helpfulness

by ddramallama



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:23:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22590163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddramallama/pseuds/ddramallama
Summary: Clarke loves her friends, she really does, honest. But there is a line that she has set for how much they can help her when it comes to her love life, and sis, this ain't it.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Comments: 8
Kudos: 113





	Unhelpful Helpfulness

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my drunk written story lol

Clarke, as she's told every single breathing second of her life; is absolutely hands down the epitome of ‘the mum friend’ of their gang of delinquents. She is the one that is always there when you’ve misbehaved, a chastising scowl already prepared along with that particular look that has even her closest of friends ditching the entire idea of loyalty, anything to make sure that they're not the ones on the receiving end of it. She gives the best hugs, though, so there is a reason as to why they keep her around. And not to mention that one time she attempted to spank Raven when the both of them were drunk out of their minds, but in all fairness, Raven probably deserved it. Still, no one will be forgetting the image of a red-faced, completely hammered Clarke Griffin trying to bend a completely hysterical Raven Reyes over her knee while yelling something along the lines of “I’m going to slap the stupidity out of that fine ass of yours,” any time soon.

(Octavia secretly has the entire thing recorded, but for her own safety Clarke has yet to hear of its existence.)

And if it’s not Raven, it’s Jasper or Octavia, sometimes even Anya; but the older woman will vehemently deny any and all interaction, Clarke Griffin was by far no friend of hers. Honestly, Clarke should really start charging for her time.

Especially after that one time she caught Raven and Anya making out in the janitor’s closet at school, that would have been a great piece of blackmail, but her stupid motherly tendencies were once again the first thing to shine through. It wasn’t all bad, though, the look of pure terror on Raven’s face is still something she finds herself randomly laughing at during the late hours of the night.

(Don't ask her why she's thinking about it during that time, she honestly doesn't know herself.)

But all of that was just the usual, for her friends, anyway, completely dysfunctional as they are. They were her children, and she would do anything for them.

Well, almost all of them. Jasper lost that privilege when he thought he was being funny, asking Clarke about who the ‘daddy’ of the group was. They all knew what he really meant; Raven’s snort, Octavia’s cringe and Clarke’s pinch to her own nose abiding by that.

However, as much as she hates him for wording it like… that, it still got her thinking, especially when she was then introduced to Lexa Woods.

Jasper words might have been more on the mark than she realized. Not that he would ever hear those particular words ever come from her mouth, but she had been more lenient when he acted like an idiot, so there was a potential possibility that he got the hint.

There was still a problem, though, because even though Clarke wasn’t completely clueless when it came to playing the courting game, Lexa was, undoubtedly, a whole different level to her past experiences.

So what does she do? Ask her friends, you know, like an idiot.

Raven had suggested doing some kind of ‘mating dance,’ (Clarke wishes she was lying, but, no, Raven really did use those exact words,) because Lexa was obviously some sort of deity and probably wouldn’t react to simply being asked on a date.

“Aren’t you dating her cousin?” Octavia couldn’t help but ask, looking just as creeped out by Raven’s words as Clarke felt.

“Yeah, but I think we can all agree that Anya’s definitely from down below if ya catch my drift.”

Clarke did, and the insulted scoff was also completely ignored as she turned to Octavia instead, “any ideas that aren’t some kind of innuendo?” She could feel Raven’s eye-roll, but in Clarke’s mind, she was already in time out.

She wasn’t sure if Octavia’s noncommittal shrug was any better, at least Raven provided an answer, one that she wouldn’t ever take upon, mind you, as Raven’s ideas more or less always involve something exploding in some shape or form.

… Actually, now that she thinks about it…

* * *

She wasn’t even entirely sure why she even came to Bellamy to ask the same question, as her only reasoning would be that he’s had plenty of girlfriends before. And, depending on which way you look at it, that is probably not the best of signs when asking someone about how they should ask someone out.

“Why ask me?” He asks back, his eyebrow raised, “wouldn’t O be better as answering that?”

“Been there, done that,” Clarke sighs, plopping down on the couch beside him, “she was about as useful as a whale in the desert.”

Bellamy opens his mouth to no doubt talk about how factually improbable that is, but Clarke is already getting up to leave before a single word can escape the confines of his mouth. Her sudden departure making him blink owlishly behind his glasses.

* * *

So, maybe this was the desperation talking, but she reasons that it will be decided on whether this is a good or bad plan after she’s asked the question.

In all fairness, Monty took it all in stride, but whatever he was about to say was pushed aside when Jasper grabbed onto Clarke’s shoulders with a high pitched, “dude!”

No, it wasn’t the desperation talking, but, yes, this was definitely a bad idea.

“Okay; first of all,” Clarke says, as calmly as she is able, while gently removing Jasper’s hands, “never call me dude again, ever. And second; answer the question.” At that moment, she was trying to remember the reason as to why she ever came to her friends for advice in the first place, and, funnily enough, she couldn’t find it.

“Actually Clarke, I might have an idea,” Monty butts in before Jasper can annoy the blonde further, his innocent smile pumping hope back into Clarke’s heart.

“Yes, Monty?”

“Well, you still need to find out if there’s even a possibility of Lexa liking you back, right?” At Clarke’s silent nod, he continues, “well, why don’t you ask her out platonically, but still treat it like it’s a date. At least that way, there’s a chance to see if Lexa has romantic feelings for you.”

It wasn’t the worst idea, after all; she and Lexa were close enough that she could ask the other to ‘hang out’ without it meaning anything, but the prospect of not having her feelings returned is certainly a painful one to endure.

Still, what could go wrong?

* * *

Everything, everything could go wrong.

"Why am I here?" Murphy looks as happy as he usually does, but there is no doubt he’s onto something with his question.

"To help get Griffin laid,” Raven answers back with a frightful amount of excitement, and she should consider herself lucky that she’s standing too far away for Clarke to punch her.

“Gross, that’s what you called me for? No thanks, I’m out.”

"Will you two be quiet? You're going to ruin the plan."

Clarke sighs out her anger, fingers deep into the skin of her temple. She had explicitly told everyone to not show up because she wanted to just be alone with Lexa, but, no, she should have known that it wouldn’t work out the way she wants it to.

Lexa is definitely not going to give her a chance if her friends are around, that's for sure.

"Clarke, hello." Despite the amount of noise, Clarke was very quick to pick up on the smooth voice of Lexa woods, a smile appearing as soon as their eyes met from across the car park. A very annoyed looking Anya sulking behind the approaching brunette.

"Lexa!" If Clarke didn't know her friend, she would have thought Raven's enthusiasm was genuinely innocent. But, alas, that isn't the case, as she's reminded by the sly twitch against her smirk and the subtle wink.

"Raven, " Lexa nods, a small confused frown pulling on her pouty lips. 

Luckily, Anya steps forward before any major damage could be done, her fingers clamping around the collar of Raven's jacket as she dragged her away, Raven allowing it with a pleased grin. And if Clarke hadn't been thankful with that alone, then she was sure that she'd is going to owe Anya later as she sent her signature glare to the rest of her friends, each of them dispersing into different directions without a moment's hesitation. 

Okay; so, one problem down, and one more to go.

Returning her focus back to Lexa, Clarke found the apology falling from her lips before she could stop it, "sorry about them," she loves her friends, she does, but this was something she would have to do by herself, even though she felt very close to fainting by just being in Lexa's general vicinity. 

Thankfully, Lexa didn't seem to mind, a small smile appearing, "it's no trouble, Clarke," her words, along with the slight glimmer in those gorgeous green eyes showed off hints of amusement. And with it, a harsh thump against Clarke's chest from her pounding heart. 

"Now," Lexa spoke, gesturing towards the cinema, "shall we?" 

* * *

"Hm, good morning."

Clarke was positive she would never tire of hearing that first thing in the morning. Especially when the words were whispered against her cheek, Lexa's smile pressing warmly against her skin before a kiss followed. Pleasant tingles speeding their way down her spine with the sneaky swipes of a teasing tongue that Lexa played off as nothing more than innocent affection.

Clarke knew better, however. Especially when Lexa trailed up towards her ear, the sensitive skin doing wonders for her growing arousal. 

Ironically enough, Lexa actually found that piece of information out on their first 'date' (as it turns out, much to Clarke's delight. Her feelings were, quite obviously, reciprocated.) Lexa had turned to whisper something into Clarke's ear during the movie, but as it stands, she had gotten a little closer than planned. The bright blush against the blonde's skin hidden against the darkness when the hints of a startled moan rattled against her throat. 

Raven had thought it was hilarious, as did Octavia. 

She had refused to acknowledge their existence for a week. 

"A very good morning," Clarke creaks out, turning over so she could properly face her girlfriend. Smiling at the little whine Lexa let out when she was forced to release her lips from Clarke's tantalising skin. "How long is it until we are expected?"

"By your friend's standards, right now. Technically, about an hour," Lexa teases, melting with warmth at the laugh she was rewarded with before Clarke's lips were over her own, expertly guided fingers pushing under the hem of her loose sleep shirt as Clarke rolled her onto her back. 

Mornings had always been their thing, whether it was cuddled tight under the blankets or kissing every single bit of skin. Clarke craves her mornings with Lexa like an addict with their coffee, her behaviour dramatically different if she has to wake up alone, or in a bed that wasn't theirs because of work or whatever else dared to get in their way. 

But this particular morning, with Lexa's warm body between her thighs, and with her tight muscles twitching under her palms, Clarke knew this morning was leading towards the hot and heavy. 

For her part, Lexa gave any control she possessed to her lover willingly, her own hands running up the smooth surface of Clarke's back and eliciting shivers wherever her fingers touched. Clarke's shirt following along until the blonde tore her lips away to remove over her head and tossing it out of mind. 

They could feel their harsh pants sliding passed their swollen lips, Lexa moving until she was sitting, using her palms where they were against Clarke's hips to move her until no space separated them. Clarke's thighs locking them in place. 

"I love you," Lexa whispers into Clarke's very soul, tenderly joining their foreheads together. 

"I -"

"Get up losers!"

Jolting apart, Clarke was extremely close to falling off the bed and face planting the floor just as Raven burst into their bedroom, Anya right on her heels with a delighted smirk when she takes notice of what they've clearly just disrupted. "Having some morning fun, were we?" 

"Oh my God," Clarke groans into her pillow, no longer caring that she was still in her underwear, (to be fair, Raven has seen her completely naked, but she's not entirely certain what the reaction of the other two would be should they ever find that out. The Woods family were very... territorial.) 

"Do you mind?" Lexa glares at the two new arrivals, the soft tone she had with Clarke nowhere in sight. 

"Not at all," Raven easily replies, shit-eating grin firmly in place, "please, continue."

Before her girlfriend ends up in the hospital, Anya grabs onto her arm and begins dragging her out, amusement clear as day as she calls out "take your time, although I doubt you need it," before closing the door behind them. 

After a few beats pass, Clarke stops trying to suffocate against her pillow and turns towards Lexa, a deep sense of defeat filling her eyes.

"Lex, we're getting new friends, I've decided."

**Author's Note:**

> What is this I would like to know
> 
> If you ever want to make a request for The 100 hmu on [Tumblr](https://ddramallama.tumblr.com)


End file.
